Will and I are very polar opposite in the way that Will walks into a room and loves having all the attention where as I would find the nearest corner, park my hiney, and observe. I keep many many things private. However, I feel like I want to share what has been happening with my family over the past three weeks. Steven, my nephew, came to stay with us for about three weeks. It really was a Godsend that he was here. I became rapidly ill. In one weekend, I couldn't hold water down and ended up losing 5 pounds. I was at a point where I couldn't even take care of my sweet Madeline. A very heart-breaking point. Steven had been helping as much as an 18 year old can, but I couldn't imagine doing it alone when Will went back to work on Monday. With a quick phone call, Wendi was here within 24 hours to help take care of me and Madeline. That Monday, I was in the hospital receiving two bags of liquid because I was obviously dehydrated. I was feeling better and received an amazing amount of anti-nausea medication. On Thursday, I had another doctor's appointment. This was an appointment that was the most surreal moment I've had. My baby was no longer moving nor had a heartbeat. Yes, I was pregnant. Will and I were waiting to tell people after the first trimester, similar to Madeline, but because of the uncertainty of how far along I was, we were in limbo. I was roughly 8 1/2 weeks along. The constant vomiting was due to the large amount of cysts on my ovaries. The doctors were amazed I wasn't on fertility medication when I got pregnant. Needless, to say there is a lot to be thankful for. First and foremost, we have the most beautiful daughter that we could have ever imagined. Second, I'm thankful for Steven for being here at the right time and Wendi, who without hesitation, flew down to help pick up pieces I was unable to. I'm also thankful for my neighbor friend, Emma who has been Madeline's guardian angel. She has, without question, watched Madeline when Will and I had to go to the ER or to a doctor's appointment. I cannot begin to tell you how incredible Will has been through this process. He is still able to get a smile out of me daily which is something I don't take for granted.
Most of you who read my blog, have been contacted privately through Will or I and again, thank you for your words of encouragement, prayers, and positive thoughts. We appreciate you! I also am well aware that there is a handful of you who have gone through this same thing I have. I sympathize deeply with you.
I still have my logic that is outweighing my emotions, for now. I keep telling myself how lucky I am and keep trying to be positive. Tomorrow I go through the D&C so I can start my road to recovery. I will be focused on nothing but my beautiful family for the months to come. Will's deployment will be here before you know it and there's many memories to be made before then.
Please know that I'm sharing this private moment of my life not to get sad eyes or be the center of attention. I'm sharing this with you to know that even through the roughest of obstacles there are many many things I am thankful for.
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| Wendi's first attempt at doing Madeline's hair. |
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| Each cluster looked like its own little firework explosion. |